And now, in the interest of public service, we present:

• Saw doppelganger at night

• Told Bond entire plan

• Attempted to hypnotize cobra with flute despite its clearly established passion for the bassoon

• Refused to let elitist, classicist, leftist, socialistic governmental attempts at intrusion on personal freedoms keep you from tormenting lions

• Dominatrix lost focus for split second

• Looked a little too much like an elderly Hitler

• Crushed by overwhelming sense of meaninglessness in an empty universe  and/or tractor dropped from roof

• Realized too late that the phrase “Leave me! Save yourselves!” is best spoken to dedicated loved ones and not panic-stricken strangers well out of earshot

• Figurative statement taken literally

• Junior weren’t never none too good with workin’ the safety on Ol’ Betsy